Ebony Night

Apple, Octopus...I havent seen an intenser female singer than Fiona Apple. Her vocals are amazing and the nuances of her quavering voice just express her emotions better than any other singer Ive heard. Her physically distressed body adds to her kudos, maybe a little too much, but she isnt faking it, thats for sure.

Only when this song came on this morning did it tumble to me that when the light started flashing during the Wuthering Heights song yesterday, my wife and daughter were at the time visiting Liverpool. Of course Liverpool was where Heathcliffe was found living as a street child in the novel !

Along with the apple I have for a long while just known that there is something mystical about the octopus. Like the apple, the octopus symbolises something profound and has cropped up a number of times this weekend. The octopus, the apple and the word ash all I know by instinct hold great truths and relevance. What those truths are shall hopefully be revealed to me.  

Yes, I posted this song in last years blog and I am doing so again tonight because something very weird happened when this song was played today in a cafe. Immediately on hearing this song I noticed a ceiling lamp start to flash. It over hung the table in front of me. The men sat at the table were all electric company repair men on dinner break. Yes, really. The lyrics " Its me. Im Cathy..." seemed humorous as I was sat in a cafe. The fact the electric light flashed above a table of electricians showed humour too. Showing off. Ive seen " Catherine " do this before when her name randomly appeared on some carol lyrics contained in last years zoom carol service. Do you know any carol lyrics containing the name Catherine ? No, me neither. Beyond coincidence again. Showing off. Well it seems you have " come home " alright. Lets hope you dont destroy my Christmas again. She is not a good omen.

 The north wind is howling around this house and a storm is forecast with snow showers too. I can hear leaves scattering and buckets rattling as they are flung by the wind around the yard. There is a December type of damp cold in the air. The huge beech trees are swaying and the wind in their tops sounds like the sea. Next morning- That must have been one of the worst windy nights ive experienced in my life. The north wind literally tore and flapped at this house all night as though it was trying to get a grip. Snow blew horizontal, and at the rear of the house the wind was churning with a strange kind of turbulence. Im about to get up and see if there is any damage on the farm. I expect nationally there will be lots of disruption. And the there were the bad dreams and constantly being woken up by the storm. At times the wind made a booming bass type noise as it hit the house directly. I feel drained by the night. 

Progress ?!  My daughter says Blogger doesnt work properly because its " old fashioned and no one uses it " She went on to say " There are 3 stars of the social scene - Twitter , Instagram... " and ive forgotten the third one...lol  The irony is that we post things we dont want to be seen too widely, at least I do and always have, stuff I wouldnt put on FB, mostly. And thats what makes it special ?

Active Seems old habits die hard. Watching the moon like I used to. Maybe its me projecting but Im sure thats a face at the beginning of my film. Very impressed with this. Heres hoping this post doesnt disappear before morning ! Looks more god than goddess maybe ? Update : Had a lot of trouble and failed to upload the film without going through a link to YouTube. In fact I cant get any link to it now so its only on my phone now. When the film is playing you can see the face slowly form and then dissipate. Very annoyed yet again technology has blighted me. There the clouds appear to form a Z.

The first cold day of winter. We still have no neighbours next door yet so I can take photos at liberty for now.  

 A thing maybe true, but to what extent ?  Dion Fortune said that some treasures are only treasure when viewed in the moonlight, but if examined in the cold light of day are nothing more than dried leaves. Why does this haunt me tonight ?  Reality is fluid, but the human side needs stability. Why am I writing this crap tonight ? 

  Now what am I going to write ?  I wasnt expecting this direction to come, but only a fool would really deny it. I wasnt expecting anothers sudden vibrant experience of the moon and its affects to be thrust upon my attention. Lots of fond memories of this scene, the high of the waxing moon, but then the emptiness immediately on its completion or the moroseness thats flowing here tonight. Its true that ive found a person here on Blogger who has the qualities ive not found very often in the people of my everyday life. Such incites and observation about me that others never see. Sometimes such a person can know me better than anyone in real life. Thats the paradox.   

I stumbled across this utterly beautiful mix tonight by accident. 

Its the first true moon lit winter night. Wind blowing through the tree tops. Wild grey misty clouds racing across the moon at speed.  

Today as I set off to the dentists a strong annoying gusty wind got up blowing around the farm yard. The sort of wind that is a harbinger of trouble coming here. It often starts when ever I begin doing a task thats fiddly or requires some extra concentration, often a job on a car funnily. Someone else also has noted this winds timely appearance so I know Im not going mad.  Leaving the yard I thought to myself " Its the kind of day some one crashes into my car and " writes it off ". On the return journey a van came around a corner on the wrong side of the road at a high careering speed  and just managed to swerve round me. After years living here Im finally learning the signs. Its not even the super moon or blood moon yet. Going to drive my old car until it passes

 I posted about a dream and a vision I had last night but the post has vanished now and is not in drafts or mistakenly posted to a wrong blog. This is heavy and again im reaching the point that I cant say what I want here or I could as Crowley said " No man is at the mercy of anything in heaven or earth unless he wills it to be " So I go to my history and find the post listed and click on it and " this page does not exist " pops up. It did exist because its listed in my history.

 The winter nights dont change here. They feel just the same as in my childhood. Dark, damp and brooding. Summer has changed so much, but why hasnt the atmosphere of winter nights ? Its a direct replica of the past. Its about the only thing that hasnt changed in this valley. I bet they havent changed here in hundreds of years, but who really knows, eh ?

" Somethings come over me Nellie. What it is I cannot tell. I pay so little attention to my daily life. " I think this world is driving me insane. I feel a disconnect from everything. God knows what I shall be posting by Christmas !  

Heavy lies the crown. But nature knows no kings... Bummer ! 

This song followed on directly in my head after I posted IOU. Again taken from the same dreamy era of my childhood.  

  The dreams have started again, as they did this time last year. Last year she was a young short woman with dark hair who would stand very close to me. I could tell she had a great affection for me. I joked she was going to get frisky on last years blog. Last night she returned or rather a counter part of her did, but this time she had blond hair, tied back.  I found myself arguing with her in a garden she accused me of damaging. The flowers were quite robust and of the sun flower type or style. Suddenly in the midst of the argument she leans forward and kisses me on the lips instantly, and then carries on the argument with the same intensity as before. I then attempt to kiss her and she resists, all the while still scolding me until after a few attempts she yields. Heres hoping to seeing her again some night...

 What I mis-type tells me more truth  than what I type correctly ? Mis-typed, misunderstood, mistake.  " Almost always the truth amounts to a complete reversal "

 I have no interest in astrology but I drive a Vauxhall   Astra    I constantly mis - type the word  Astra as Astar  A star...Astarte - Goddess of the Moon ! Ulalume  And now, as the night was senescent And star-dials pointed to morn— As the star-dials hinted of morn— At the end of our path a liquescent And nebulous lustre was born, Out of which a miraculous crescent Arose with a duplicate horn— Astarte's bediamonded crescent Distinct with its duplicate horn. After viewing strange lights I once saw a huge shadow cresent appear for an instant in the sky.